Presto Agitato

Editorial Standards

I don't think the world could bear the shock:

That’s worse than anything else HuffPo has ever published?  Huh.  Well, if a Glenn Beck sex tape ever surfaces (which I believe was predicted by Nostradamus), one thing’s for sure: it’ll be overwhelmingly white.

Quote of the Day: In Comparison

Oh, great. The bad guys have Dr. Evil and all we have to save us is Pee Wee Herman. — Breda's Husband

Quote of the Day: Urgent Nerdity

And by 'now' I mean NOW.  Type SELECT Now() as RFN; into the query window, and whatever time comes back, that's when you do it.
                                — A very annoyed – and worried – de facto lead.

(That's getdate() in SQL Server and CURRENT_DATE or SYSDATE in Oracle.  In case you were wondering, which you weren't.)

It's All True, You Know

(h/t: Leslie)

One-Way Understanding

David French:

I think the Left fundamentally misunderstands much of the public’s opposition to the Ground Zero mosque.  Where the Left see irrational 'Islamophobia' and bigotry, I see specific opposition to the so-called Cordoba House — a triumphalist $100 million monstrosity constructed under the leadership of an imam who won’t renounce Hamas, blames America as an 'accessory' to 9/11, talks about the blood on America’s hands, morally equates al Qaeda and America, and may very well draw on Saudi and Iranian funds for his mosque.

Of course, an important question would be: Funds from which Saudis and Iranians?  Are they the good, sweet, and wonderful Saudis and Iranians, or the ones who have been sending money to al Qaeda, Jemaah Islamiyah, and al Shabab?  Imam Rauf's answer to that question: That's for me to know and you to shut up, you bigot!

Quote of the Day: The Phantom Menace

US Muslims Face New Violent Hate Menace: Drunk Art School Students Working For Peace Organization(s). — Dan Riehl

Effing New Guy

Clint Howard?  Really?  This will not go well over Thanksgiving dinner with Ronnie.

How to Sell Toothbrushes

The kids filed back into class Monday morning.  They were very excited.  Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on productive salesmanship.
 
Little Sally led off: 'I sold Girl Scout cookies and I made $30,' she said proudly.  'My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success.'
 
'Very good,' said the teacher.
 
Little Jennifer was next:
 
'I sold magazines,' she said.  'I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them up on current events.'
 
'Very good, Jennifer,' said the teacher.
 
Eventually, it was Little Johnny's turn.
 
The teacher held her breath.
 
Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher's desk.  '$2,467,' he said.
 
'$2,467!' cried the teacher.  'What in the world were you selling?'
 
'Toothbrushes,' said Little Johnny.
 
'Toothbrushes!' echoed the teacher.  'How could you possibly sell enough tooth brushes to make that much money?'
 
'I found the busiest corner in town,' said Little Johnny.  'I set up a Dip & Chip stand and gave everybody who walked by a free sample.'
 
They all said the same thing, 'Hey, this tastes like dog shit!'
 
Then I would say, 'It is dog shit.  Wanna buy a toothbrush?'
 
'I used the governmental approach of giving you something shitty for free, and then making you pay to get the shitty taste out of your mouth.'

Quote of the Day: He Who Casts the First Stone

How about this approach: Give every woman in Afghanistan an AK-47 and 1000 rounds of ammo. — Glenn Reynolds

And a long knife.

Quote of the Day: The Law New York Times is an Idiot

But many of Mr. DeLay’s actions remain legal only because lawmakers have chosen not to criminalize them. — from a New York Times editorial

Well, yes, that is generally how the law works.